And so it was that on a warm late winter afternoon in 2006 we found ourselves sitting in the waiting room of the local reproductive medicine and infertility clinic ,why were we there? Well 6 months previously we had lost our very much wanted baby and we were advised due to our age to seek IVF help.
Let me please be honest here..I found both IVF clinics we attended to have no such honesty
when queried about the success rate of couples where mothers are over 36 years of age they will skirt around the issue,beat about the bush and keep regurgtating statistics for under 35 year old women with primary infertility..that is infertility caused as a result of a primary medical reason like polycystic disease or severe endometriosis.
Honestly! Thats not what either of us wanted ,as a registered nurse married to a male midwife ..I wanted facts ..I wanted to know success rates and most importantly failure rates among the over 40 's.
This information was never given
We were by then caughte up within the system,I duly injected, was poked ,prodded,investigated ...I found out that the biological age of my eggs was about 32 which was good to hear..Unfortunately only 4 were harvested ..I informed them of my retroverted uterus which was duly ignored and the specialist implanted the embryos ,which were healthy ..blindly with no ultrasound assistance..the pain was horrendous..It will not surprise anyone to find out that 3 attempts and $12000 later there was no success.
What these clinics will not tell you is that a successfull pregnancy for the over 40's is about 15 % which is basically the same as Mother Nature's
What they do not tell you is that suppressng ovulation for the "right moment " to implant can cause an increased risk of premature menopause in women over age 35.
What they do not inform you of is the havoc wreaked by them playing with your hormones on your physical and psychological status
Everytime I went in for visits bloods etc I would be confronted with my sad sorry self in the form of other anxious women aged 40 plus..
Three attempts no more I said,Im not stupid or deluded enough to believe platitudes etc
This is what I found ..if the reproductive clinins tell you that your chances of conceiving a healthy pregnancy at age 40 plus are exactly the same as letting nature take its course would you be there? of course not
If they told you that treatment could induce early and permanent menopause you would run a mile!
the over 40's are their bread and butter,they are often financially stable with assets that they can draw on and pay thousands and thousands of dollars for an empty dream...the clinics know this..the success rates in that age group are poor and do not warrant the heavy emotional cost ...
We gave up .I was lucky I had my 2 children from my previous relationship..a loving husband I considered myself and blessed...
'
.
